Quotes Tagged "funny-but-true"

Telling an introvert to go to a party is like telling a saint to go to Hell.

Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.' But eating too many, is quite enough-plenty. And you'll have to go see the good doc anyway.

With a philosophy education, one can infuriate his peers, intimidate his date, think of obscure, unreliable ways to make money, and never regret a thing.

To be a philosopher, just reverse everything you have ever been told...and have a sense of humor doing it.

Life gave me lemons, then I met you and you had Vodka. Now my life is a party.

Tolerance! The virtue that makes one bite his tongue so that he can tear out his hair.

True devotion and humility is when you carelessly allow yourself to fall in love with things you consider will make you look inferior, which in essence, makes you superior.

Flattery does not encourage the perfect flow of love in the vein of your relationship. Be genuine and speak out what you feel for each other without hiding the painful truth.

i realize you cant just throw real gems at ppl...because they think cubic zirconia is the real thing lol

I am not pointing fingers, but rather pointing at the facts, as the facts point fingers regardless.

While she could hardly fathom what had just happened to her that night, she reached some conclusions before she fell asleep, certain things now made perfect sense; Moon River didn’t sound so syrupy, mistletoe wasn’t such a bad idea, and perhaps dating was not such a frivolous waste of time after all.

If no one knows when a person is going to die, how can we say he died prematurely?

Respect? Of course, always, to all, because everything seems funnier when you're trying to show respect.

Google, Facebook helps people than people helps people, in today's world

The manlier you are, the harder it is to understand what a woman wants: there is not a hint of female brain in you.

We men are fascinated by the things we don't really understand. It gives us something to think and talk about: like females, they drive us nuts.

It's probably not easy for a woman to understand what it's like to be a man. Imagine you're starving, and someone puts a huge buffet in front of you. There's delicious, mouth-watering food all around you, and it's really really hard not to eat it all. That's what it's like to be a man around attractive women. The urge to want to hump everything that moves is part of a man's natural programming. It's a deep-seated hunger. To suppress that hunger takes civilization and a lot of willpower.

The poorly sophisticated, since many of us are, as presumed to be, lacking in good arguments, we are then prone to being well-versed in insults.