Quotes Tagged "humor"

The Queen's Pride was his ship, and he loved her. (That was the way his sentences always went: It is raining today and I love you. My cold is better and I love you. Say hello to Horse and I love you. Like that.)

One should always be in love. That's the reason one should never marry.

Love is where you find it. I think it is foolish to go around looking for it, and I think it can be poisonous. I wish that people who are conventionally supposed to love each other would say to each other, when they fight, 'Please — a little less love, and a little more common decency'.

Statistically speaking, there is a 65 percent chance that the love of your life is having an affair. Be very suspicious.

V-Day…if you need this one day in a year to show everyone else you truly care for “your loved one” I think it’s quite stupid. I hate this commercialism. It’s all artificial, and has nothing to do with real love.

If somebody says 'I love you' to me, I feel as though I had a pistol pointed at my head. What can anybody reply under such conditions but that which the pistol holder requires? 'I love you, too'.

I don't like it when I outweigh my men.

And yet another moral occurs to me now: Make love when you can. It's good for you.

Don't go looking for boys in the dark They will say pretty things then leave you with scars. Do go looking for boys in the park For that is where the true gentlemen are.

I’m stuck babysitting turtle eggs while a volleyball player slash grease monkey slash aquarium volunteer tries to hit on me.” I’m not hitting on you,” he protested. No?” Believe me, you’d know if I was hitting on you. You wouldn’t be able to stop yourself from succumbing to my charms.

You looove me. (holds out arms) You love me this much.

Would you mind repeating that? I'm afraid I might have lost my wits altogether and just hallucinated what I've longed to hear.

My head’ll explode if I continue with this escapism.

Were you always such a stubborn, blind, obtuse girl?” “Are you calling me stupid?” “Yes, but in a more poetic way!” “Well, here’s a poem for you. Get lost!

Can't you just like a girl who likes you back?' 'None of them likes me back. I may as well like the one I really want.

How could I be sleeping with this particular man.... Surely only true love could justify my lack of taste.

A girl can still admire, can’t she? Even those who can’t afford to go in the store can still window-shop. Right? Knowing he wasn’t for me didn’t mean I couldn’t covet the merchandise.

If you have the woman you love, what more do you need? Well, besides an alibi for the time of her husband’s murder.


I love you and it's getting worse.

Deciding whether or not to trust a person is like deciding whether or not to climb a tree because you might get a wonderful view from the highest branch or you might simply get covered in sap and for this reason many people choose to spend their time alone and indoors where it is harder to get a splinter.