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The conundrum that I face on a daily basis is that I have two sons who have grown up watching 'The Simpsons,' so they know exactly what buttons to push. They know how Bart irritates Homer, and they use these lines against me to tell me that I'm not funny anymore.

I drink Vitamin Water nonstop - I should have an IV.

Instead of going to spring training, I went to basic training.

Where ignorance is bliss, 'Tis folly to be wise. - Ode on a Distant Prospect of Eton College

The only thing I rely on is caffeine.

O Allah, You know me better than I know myself, and I know myself better than these people who praise me. Make me better than what they think of me, and forgive those sins of mine of which they have no knowledge, and do not hold me responsible for what they say.

I'm quite a curious person. I don't mind being the one who doesn't know things, a role I often play in QI.

I think one of my greatest gifts is leading worship.

It is very important to have deep friendships of the opposite sex to learn so much about yourself and what you need as a human.

It is the framework which changes with each new technology and not just the picture within the frame.

Martin Luther King Jr. was not just a man of peace. He was a radical pacifist, and so he was against war across the board.

A Psalm of Life Tell me not in mournful numbers, Life is but an empty dream! For the soul is dead that slumbers, And things are not what they seem. Life is real! Life is earnest! And the grave is not its goal; Dust thou are, to dust thou returnest, Was not spoken of the soul. Not enjoyment, and not sorrow, Is our destined end or way; But to act, that each tomorrow Find us farther than today. Art is long, and Time is fleeting, And our hearts, though stout and brave, Still, like muffled drums, are beating Funeral marches to the grave. In the world's broad field of battle, In the bivouac of Life, Be not like dumb, driven cattle! Be a hero in the strife! Trust no Future, howe'er pleasant! Let the dead Past bury its dead! Act, - act in the living Present! Heart within, and God o'erhead! Lives of great men all remind us We can make our lives sublime, And, departing, leave behind us Footprints on the sand of time; Footprints, that perhaps another, Sailing o'er life's solenm main, A forlorn and shipwrecked brother, Seeing, shall take heart again. Let us then be up and doing, With a heart for any fate; Still achieving, still pursuing, Learn to labor and to wait.

There is nothing more dangerous than the conscience of a bigot.

I was probably more scared of my high school exams than I was of the Oscars. At the time you think it's everything and if you don't do well, your life's over. Opportunities are gone. So the more you do it, the less the fear is present.

I couldn't sell air conditioners on a 98-degree day. When I demonstrated them in a showroom, I pushed the wrong button and blew the circuit.

... just as food is necessary to the life of the body, so good reading is necessary to the life of the soul.

Well-written words are music.

Trust me, but look to thyself.

The principal role of a logo is to identify, and simplicity is its means... Its effectiveness depends on distinctiveness, visibility, adaptability, memorability, universality, and timelessness.

To hell with personal consequences - step up and act.