Well, certainly I think American television is - that's proper TV.
Where I get bored is when I show up for a shoot and they want me to wear a feather boa. Too obvious a thing for a poof on the telly to do.
Some people think they're depressed and they go to the doctor and want pills. And you just think: 'You hate where you live, you've lost your job, your boyfriend has dumped you, could all this be why you're depressed?'
I've so exceeded what I ever wanted to do.
I do get pleasure from very inconsequential things, like shopping for clothes.
All my interesting stories are from before I was on television. Nothing interesting has happened to me since then. Maybe it's because the most interesting thing in my life is the show and that's on telly.
Because society places a value on masculinity, gay men aspire to it. If you go to a gay club and the doorman says, 'You do realise this is a gay club, don't you lads?' you get all excited because you think, 'Wow, he thought I was straight!'
I loved Lucille Ball growing up.
My mobile rang around lunchtime one day, and it was George Michael. He wanted to come in on Friday. We were like, 'okay, if that's what you want'. And he was a very good guest. That's a real exception to the rule.
If you'd told the young Graham Norton that I'd one day have this amount of money, I'd have assumed it would have come from a lottery win.
Occasionally the state of the planet can knock me off my perky perch.
It sounds deeply shallow, but for brief spells every member of the public can be fascinating.
My ambition was to stop waiting tables. That was how I measured success: finally, I was able to stop waiting tables, and I was able to pay the rent, and that was by being a stand-up comic. Not a very good stand-up comic, but good enough to make a living.
It's amazing how I can just ramble on for hours, isn't it? And so unentertaining or uninteresting. But I can ramble on for hours. It's a sort of terrible gift, isn't it?
