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A sexy selfie can be incredibly empowering - but remember that, while a Snapchat message might expire, nothing on the Internet truly disappears.

When I found I had given birth to a human wreckage, to a child that was an imbecile, my heart was broken.

After all those years in the business, I asked myself, 'Am I really any good? Or am I only good because I'm with good people - a Murray Pearlstein, a Ralph Lauren?

Life is a disease: sexually transmitted, and invariably fatal.

My father passed away after three years of debilitating disease, which transformed a very strong and bright man into a real wreck. And that is hard. You have to get out of that stronger, if you can, which I was lucky to be able to. I was the eldest of the family, and I had to support my mother and help my brothers.

Even though standup seems like one-way conversation, if you're doing it right, it's actually a two-way discussion between the comic and the audience... the audience just happens to be communicating through laughter.

It is part of the fundamental impulse in all living things to reach for light, part of the indomitable will to see.

The words that strike us are those that awake an echo in a zone we have already made our own—the place where we live—and the vibration enables us to find fresh starting points within ourselves.

I was very influenced by The Magic Mountain. It's a book that had a huge impact on me. I loved that as a shape for a novel: put a bunch of people in a beautiful place, give them all tuberculosis, make them all stay in a fur sleeping bag for several years and see what happens.

I've taken clowns into the war in Bosnia, the refugee camps of Kosovo, and none of those are any more important than clowning in a subway or an elevator or just walking down the street.

I think people of my generation became journalists - you know, right after the broadcast pioneer fathers - because we wanted to report the big stories.

When I was in the West Coast watching the Giants, Rich Aurilia was a guy I always liked.

It is not the employer who pays wages - he only handles the money. It is the product that pays wages.

Those who are able to climb up the ladder will find ways to pull it up after them, or selectively lower it down to allow their friends, allies, and kin to scramble up. In other words: 'Who says meritocracy says oligarchy.'

I remember I asked my mom for a ukulele, and she said no because she thought I would never play it. So then I got my birthday money up, and I bought my own. It was the most rebellious thing I've ever done.

I'm really careful with what the music gets put with, and we say no to so much stuff, loads of it, for things that might quadruple the sales of my album. But if it doesn't fit then it doesn't fit, you know?

Schoolhouses are the republican line of fortifications.

Why would Senator Allen want to oppose saving money for the state? It's simply another example of Republicans fighting the governor tooth and nail against any measure where she might be able to turn the state's budget around.

I just have to do what I have to do, and just let my hands go and focus.

When I won in 2003, never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would win Wimbledon and have my kids seeing me lift the trophy, so this is pretty surreal. And yeah, I was almost shocked in the moment that it all came together so nicely.