Human love is the shadow of the Great love; its child. And of all human loves, it is romantic love which has the most riveting effect upon our soul. Ageless and perennial, it is forever finding an outlet in poetry, music, dance, story-telling, and the media. We never tire of it. It commands attention at so many turns, such is the longing for its presence in our life. It is not by accident that it has such an unfailing pull on our psyche. If we cannot connect with visible human love, we will not be able to find the invisible Love. Human love is leading us, most of us unknowingly, straight to the divinity of our own nature. And that nature leads us, in turn, to the source of life itself.
I am nothing more than his safe way to begin. I am Ruben’s starter kit. A short preface that will soon pale when his real story begins. An overture to the symphony he will discover beyond me, after me, without me. I try to feel honored to perform that public service for the gay community at large.
Being a nurse, I’m well trained in being careful with the language that I use. Words have power. They can keep someone calm. Or they can freak someone the fuck out when they’re in a bad place. They can keep someone at a distance. Or they can bring them close. It’s why I resisted when he suggested I call him by his first name. I was keeping him at a distance. But apparently my subconscious has been telling me this whole time that I shouldn’t do that.
Giving yourself permission to fall for someone is hard. Well, terrifying, really,” he amends. “But sometimes we have to let go of how we think things should go and just let them happen. It’s the simplest and most difficult part of giving a relationship a go.