I'm not the voice of reason; I'm more the guy using these offensive topics as fodder to raise tension in a joke.
I always made the joke that I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when Warner Brothers first put 'Tusk' on and listened to it in their boardroom as a follow-up to 'Rumours.'
Dick Martin, if you put a gun to his forehead, he couldn't tell you a joke.
If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?
Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee, and I'll forgive Thy great big joke on me.
My way of joking is to tell the truth. That's the funniest joke in the world.
I thought Twitter was a joke. I really thought it was a gag. I thought it was like National Lampoon or the Onion.
The fact is, the Middle East has been going crazy for 50, 60, 70 years. So it's not like, 'Oh, I need an ISIS joke.'
It is a good deed to forget a poor joke.
I have a great pic of my father and Rev. Graham laughing hysterically at some joke with George Pratt Shultz looking on back in 1972 or so.
I've made a lot of grown men cry with laughter, because I really am quite the joke.
If I sit down to write a joke about, whatever, the polluted Gulf of Mexico, it comes out mundane to me.
I have had every hair color. I joke with my hair colorist. She keeps sheets of paper on every hair color that I've had, so she has records of it all. She's done my hair since I was 15, and I guess I have a thick folder going because I've had so many different hair colors.
I used to have this joke: 'Every hallway is a runway.'
Louis CK knows that just because a joke is using space as a resource instead of something to be crammed like a hamper, this doesn't mean a story isn't happening.
Sometimes my colleagues joke and call me Hannah.
What other culture could have produced someone like Hemingway and not seen the joke?
There's been lots of theater that uses hip-hop in it, but more often than not, it's used as a joke - isn't it hilarious that these characters are rapping. I treat it as a musical form, and a musical form that allows you to pack in a ton of lyric.
The joke may be that no one likes fruitcake, but if that were the case, they wouldn't appear on store shelves every holiday season!
The best timed joke or the best timed phrase comes at spontaneous moments and just relies on me as the host to be very quick, and that's what I do.