People live too much of their lives on email or the Internet or text messages these days. We're losing all of our communication skills.
I love animals, but I don't want to talk to them. I'd rather be able to talk to other people on other continents and understand them.
I'm no Jerry Seinfeld. I wasn't raised with some backyard with a creek and trees and all that.
My older brother was born, who was a cripple, then I was born, and my sister was born, the only girl. So I was between the only girl and the crippled guy. I was the middle guy.
I love '30 Rock' because Tina Fey allows me to fly over the cuckoo nest once a week.
I do stand up sometimes out of anger. Sometimes the greatest stuff comes from a dark place.
Anybody who's lived in the ghetto knows that you don't move during the daytime. Here's why: You don't want anyone to know you're leaving, and you don't want anyone knowing where you're going.
When you're in the spotlight, people want to dissect you and then put you back together the way they want you.
I'm not a child star, but you could say that I've grown up on TV. I went from being an unknown, down-and-out comic from Brooklyn and the Bronx to being a regular character on a major network comedy called 'Martin.' From there I went on to become the most notable black comic on 'Saturday Night Live' since Eddie Murphy.
Cool is the enemy of funny. You can't be cool and be funny at the same time. Only Eddie Murphy could do that.
Comedians are the monkeys of acting. When you go to the zoo, everybody loves the monkey exhibit.
The version of me you see on TV now and in my feature films is a pretty happy guy, isn't he?
You have to be highly intelligent to get away with a dumb joke. That takes a pretty smart fella.
If I gamble, I'll play roulette. My wife and I will play roulette, and that's about it. I'm not a heavy gambler.
You will be surprised but I do a lot of studying and I watch National Geographic.
I want to be an example of a guy who made something of himself out of nothing. A guy who overcame the odds of a tough childhood, who worked hard, who didn't let his surroundings get the best of him and lead him to jail or the graveyard. Where I ended up - being a comedian, a TV star, and a movie actor - might be unique, but my story is not.
You gotta understand, my great-grandfather was German and Irish. My grandmother was Indian, and my grandfather was African-American, so we all got a little something in us.
What you have to understand is that my thing is not glamour. I love stretch marks and C-section scars and all of that. I'm a grown man. You don't gotta put on no makeup with me.
What am I afraid of? The IRS. That's it. I don't want those people knockin' on my door, man.
So I think all comedians are earning their wings into heaven. We're all going to heaven, but everybody's not going to get their wings. Some people are just going to be regular angels. Doing cleanup, janitor work. In heaven, I'm going to sit on the couch with Oprah.