We all have, in my family, what we call the 'Vorderman bottom' - a sticky out, bigger-than-normal, signature, of the rear variety. It's been a family joke all our lives - even my lovely brother has one. I know the lines to all the good singalong big bum songs.
More than 55,000 men from Bomber Command lost their lives, of whom 38,000 were British. That's one in 10 of all the British servicemen lost in the Second World War. It beggars belief that there has not been some recognition for what they gave until now.
I can't be bothered to go to the gym, though. I honestly just can't be bothered - it's the most boring thing on Earth. I have tried and every six months I go 'right, I'm going to the gym'. Then I do it for two weeks and get so bored by it.
The first couple of days on the detox diet aren't pleasant.
There are machines that can get rid of your cellulite, so I want to do that. And my friend has just had a machine that has worked on her neck and tightened the elasticity of the skin. You just need a day off work afterwards, so I'm thinking, why not?
I'm a bit frightened of the idea of a full facelift because, when you look in the mirror, you want to look like yourself.
My bottom is so big it's got its own gravitational field.
There was a great strain in our family because my father didn't want anything to do with me. He was happy to see my brother and sister, but not me. I don't know why. Maybe it was shame. I don't know. But he never wanted anything to do with me. That rejection was terribly hurtful and it went on for years.
One day Mum saved up for this exciting new thing - a frozen chicken. She cooked it on the Sunday and we all sat around waiting for it, but there was a terrible smell from the kitchen. She didn't realise that the giblets were in a plastic bag inside it. We just ate vegetables and she cried and cried.
Ruby Wax has basically ruined my career. You'll see when you watch the programme. I get more intimate with Ruby than I've ever been with another woman.
My first marriage was totally unsuitable and shouldn't have happened. It was a whirlwind, rebound thing. I was 23 or 24 - a baby.
