The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.
Being in the hospice didn't work out exactly the way I had expected. By all rights, I should have finished my time here in mid-March 2006 - at least, that's when Medicare stopped paying.
The Marine Corps was the first father figure I had ever known.
A bad liver is to a Frenchman what a nervous breakdown is to an American. Everyone has had one and everyone wants to talk about it.
This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday... I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me - Homeland Security.
A humorist has to be taken seriously before he's considered a real writer.
I've known Don since he came to Washington. When he first came to work for George W. Bush, he was a different Don Rumsfeld. He was jolly, full of life, and ready to go to war, but only if we could win.
I worship the quicksand he walks in.
Have you ever seen a candidate talking to a rich person on television?
Men and women cannot live by bread alone. They must also tinkle. Show me someone who has no trouble tinkling, and I will show you a happy and rich person.
Tax reform is taking the taxes off things that have been taxed in the past and putting taxes on things that haven't been taxed before.