He who leaves his house in search of happiness pursues a shadow.
Laughter is the best medicine.
Being asked one day what was the surest way of remaining happy in this world, the Emperor Sigismund of Germany replied: "Only do in health what you have promised to do when you were sick."
Better be happy than wise.
It is comparison that makes men happy or miserable.
Let him that would be happy for a day, go to the barber; for a week, marry a wife; for a month, buy him a new horse; for a year, build him a new house; for all his lifetime, be an honest man.
Who will present pleasure refrain, shall in time to come the more pleasure obtain.
The really happy man is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
Happiness consists of living each day as if it were the first day of your honeymoon and the last day of your vacation.
Enjoy yourself. These are the "good old days" you're going to miss in the years ahead.
No pleasure without pain.
Pleasure is not pleasant unless it cost dear.
Sadness and gladness succeed each other.
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't there more happy teenagers?
To improve your memory, lend people money.
I get my exercise being a pallbearer for those of my friends who believed in regular running and calisthenics.
My husband wasn't listening when the doctor asked for "a urine, stool, and semen sample" . . . so I just told him they wanted his shorts.
doctor to stout patient: You've been swallowing your food again.
You will never know true happiness until you have truly loved, and you will never understand what pain really is until you have lost it.
Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
