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I won't cook in deep fat. Years ago, I met a fireman who said most kitchen fires were caused by deep fat, and I don't think that's changed. Oven chips are good enough for my grandchildren, and they're chuffed with that.

'Romeo and Juliet,' 'Manon,' 'Giselle' - they are not stupid stories. They have fantastic characters. They have a big package of emotion.

I have a wonderful road manager, and he travels with me. And my valet and friend travels with me. My little entourage is great, and they take good care of me.

My age and my phone number are both unlisted.

When professors expect a few dozen students and hundreds show up, it's a mixed blessing. While it's a testament to their popularity, it also means they have to scramble to interview and hire more teaching fellows, schedule rooms, and order lab supplies.

The truth is always an insult or a joke, lies are generally tastier. We love them. The nature of lies is to please. Truth has no concern for anyone's comfort

A humorist has to be taken seriously before he's considered a real writer.

Everything I've learned, I've learned with the beatings I've gotten from all of the bad choices I made.

I'm a sponge for historical images of black people and black history on film.

The pain of losing my child was a cleansing experience. I had to throw overboard all excess baggage and keep only what is essential.

I've never got on with the British press because they've always given me such a hard time. Once they build a band up they just want to do people down. They shouldn't concentrate on the colour of someone's shirt they should listen to the music.

We are making it very clear to all countries that nothing justifies terrorism. There are no political reasons that justify it; there is no cause, no grievance that justifies it. And we will do everything possible to make sure that all countries of the world understand that.

It is pandemonium backstage. I straighten ties, see if their shoes are laced - and I always have to remember to check their flies just before they walk out.

Problems will disappear as darkness disappears with the onset of light.

Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.

There is hardly a political question in the United States which does not sooner or later turn into a judicial one.

Pessimism is as American as apple pie - frozen apple pie with a slice of processed cheese.

With the skyrocketing costs of prescription drugs, American taxpayers shouldn't be footing the bill for medicine going to waste.

In your moments of solitude, when self-doubt, worry, anxiety and fear creep in, dive deep into what you love doing. This could be music, painting, gardening, reading, cooking…whatever…do whatever that makes you forget this world, that makes you forget your pain…surely, there is something that makes you forget who you are. Simply, go do it. When you do this, you will realize how you magically heal, how all your stresses and insecurities vanish. This is why Bliss is so powerful. This is why following your Bliss is so profitable. It helps you live in this world, inevitably trapped in the pulls and pressures of everyday existence, and yet be above all of it, thriving, living happily despite the circumstances.

Why hasn't anyone killed him yet?” “Dumb luck,” Wit said. “In that I’m lucky you’re all so dumb.