Praise out of season, or tactlessly bestowed, can freeze the heart as much as blame.
We cultivate love when we allow our most vulnerable and powerful selves to be deeply seen and known, and when we honor the spiritual connection that grows from that offering with trust, respect, kindness and affection. Love is not something we give or get; it is something that we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each one of them – we can only love others as much as we love ourselves. Shame, blame, disrespect, betrayal, and the withholding of affection damage the roots from which love grows. Love can only survive these injuries if they are acknowledged, healed and rare.
An ignorant person is inclined to blame others for his own misfortune. To blame oneself is proof of progress. But the wise man never has to blame another or himself.
I'm convinced that most men don't know what they believe, rather, they only know what they wish to believe. How many people blame God for man's atrocities, but wouldn't dream of imprisoning a mother for her son's crime?
Poor God, how often He is blamed for all the suffering in the world. It’s like praising Satan for allowing all the good that happens.
On the subject of who is to blame for our disunity - “The easy conclusion- that the devil is at work trying to destroy the church- is true, but itʼs not the whole story. Of course the enemy is at work doing that. But closer examination shows that much of the blame falls squarely on the shoulders of the church itself-on believers in god-and how our own devilish deeds have alienated other followers of God. Sadly, weʼve done the devilʼs work for him.
The elimination diet: Remove anger, regret, resentment, guilt, blame, and worry. Then watch your health, and life, improve.
Do not rush to judge someone unless his/her fruits reveal the truth. However, don't forget; mostly, it's not the fault of the tree to produce bitter fruits. Sometimes, the soil determines that; blame the source! Deal with the soil! Don't deal with the tree! Other trees are there that the same soil can influence! Don't deal with your enemy, deal with the satan that sponsors them!
Don't call anyone a devil, because within you, you can experience hell and the devil, and the devil is nothing, but you!
No one is to blame because there is no one other than you. Nothing is to disrespect because there is nothing other than you.
Stop pointing fingers and placing blame on others. Your life can only change to the degree that you accept responsibility for it.
Blame is the creed of the disempowered.
Blaming others for your unhappiness is a habit that’s hard to give up because it triggers some happy chemicals. You feel important when you battle perceived injustice (serotonin), and you bond with others who feel similarly deprived (oxytocin). You get excited when you seek and find evidence that you have been denied your fair share of happiness (dopamine). You may even trigger endorphins by welcoming physical pain into your life as evidence of your deprivation. You keep building a circuit for seeking happiness by feeling wronged.
We habitually erect a barrier called blame that keeps us from communicating genuinely with others, and we fortify it with our concepts of who's right and who's wrong. We do that with the people who are closest to us and we do it with political systems, with all kinds of things that we don't like about our associates or our society. It is a very common, ancient, well-perfected device for trying to feel better. Blame others....Blaming is a way to protect your heart, trying to protect what is soft and open and tender in yourself. Rather than own that pain, we scramble to find some comfortable ground.
It is convenient for the old men to blame Eve. To insist we are damned because a country girl talked to the snake one afternoon long ago. Children must starve in Somalia for that, and old women be abandoned in our greatest cities. It’s why we will finally be thrown into the lakes of molten lead. Because she was confused by happiness that first time anyone said she was beautiful. Nevertheless, she must be the issue, so people won’t notice that rocks and galaxies, mathematics and rust are also created in His image.
We may place blame, give reasons, and even have excuses; but in the end, it is an act of cowardice to not follow your dreams.
To blame my failures on the lack of resources is less about the lack of resources and more about my unwillingness to access those resources.
So often survivors have had their experiences denied, trivialized, or distorted. Writing is an important avenue for healing because it gives you the opportunity to define your own reality. You can say: This did happen to me. It was that bad. It was the fault & responsibility of the adult. I was—and am—innocent.” The Courage to Heal by Ellen Bass & Laura Davis
Only love that continues to flow in the face of anger, blame, and indifference can be called love. All else is simply a transaction.
In some ways, we will always be different. In other ways, we will always be the same. There is always room to disagree and blame, just as there is always room to take a new perspective and empathize. Understanding is a choice.