It was great to be the rock comic, the shock comic. But after you've played Giants Stadium with Bon Jovi in front of 82,000 people, after you've done the 'Wild Thing' video with Jessica Hahn and every rock band from hell, you're not gonna top that.
When has stand-up comedy been kind to anyone? It goes after anyone who's the target. Comedy attacks, man.
Stand-up comedy is an art form and it dies unless you expand it.
Jesus is still up in Heaven, thumbing through his Bible, going 'Where did I say build a water slide?'
Folks, I've been straight for seventeen days... Not all in a row.
You don't know what a rough crowd is. If all I have to do is go make people laugh, that's nothing. Let me tell you what a tough crowd is. A tough crowd is going to a morning service and you got six people there and you gotta pat your house payment. That's a tough crowd.