By the time I started doing stand-up, the club scene had died.
At first, there was a separation of clubs and sketch comedy. Now there's all kinds of comedy, making us one big happy family.
Instead of saving for someone else's college education, I'm currently saving for a luxury retirement community replete with golf carts and handsome young male nurses who love butterscotch.
I'd love to be a hit in Germany. I'm working on trying to get a gig as David Hasselhoff's opening act.
I have memories of my grandfather Kirkman making mashed potatoes that were so good because they tasted like a bowl of butter. I love my mom's brownies. My favorite thing about both of those recipes is that someone else made them for me.
I have this idyllic love life, but my mind just won't accept that. I would like to bring a new guy home every night. I try to make humor out of that situation.