Résumé Razors pain you, Rivers are damp, Acids stain you, And drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful, Nooses give, Gas smells awful. You might as well live.
Tags: suicide, humor, dark-humor

Other Quotes by "Dorothy Parker"

Men They hail you as their morning star Because you are the way you are. If you return the sentiment, They'll try to make you different; And once they have you, safe and sound, They want to change you all around. Your moods and ways they put a curse on; They'd make of you another person. They cannot let you go your gait; They influence and educate. They'd alter all that they admired. They make me sick, they make me tired.
Tags: poetry, men, humor, dorothy-parker
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.
Tags: ugly, humor, classic-insult, beauty
I like best to have one book in my hand, and a stack of others on the floor beside me, so as to know the supply of poppy and mandragora will not run out before the small hours.
Tags: reading-books, reading, books, book-lovers, book
Prince or commoner, tenor or bass, Painter or plumber or never-do-well, Do me a favor and shut your face - Poets alone should kiss and tell.
Tags: relationships, men, love, gossip
You can't teach an old dogma new tricks.
Tags: wit, religion, attributed-no-source
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