Soul mates are people in our lives whom we connect to on a deep level. As the name implies, soul mates are primarily friends of the soul. If you have found your soul mate they will likely be the best, and truest friend, you will ever have. You’ll be able to share everything with your soul mate, from your wildest dreams to your most shameful secrets. Nothing is off limits.
A twin flame is a person who is your friend, lover, and teacher in this life. He or she is the catalyst of your spiritual growth and the mirror of your deepest desires, needs, and fears. Your twin flame will reflect back to you all of your inner shadows, but also your deepest beauty and greatest strengths. In this way, your twin flame helps you to access tremendous emotional, psychological, and spiritual growth.
Attracting a person into your life who is genuinely compatible with you requires inner work. How can you discover who your soul mate is without first knowing who you really are and what you really want out of life? You’ll always be clambering around in the dark.
Twin flames do not “complete” you because you are already innately “complete” at a soulful level. Instead, they compliment you deeply and help you to grow.
It’s a sad reality, but in our relationships as a species, we treat each other as objects to be owned and possessed. But once we do manage to cage or “secure” our partners to “be our everything,” we suffer horribly. Once we metaphorically capture that beautiful bird we were initially attracted to, we feel guilty every time the bird chirps: we are reminded that we’ve taken away the very thing that made the bird so beautiful in the first place.
Soul mate and twin flame relationships are perhaps one of the most powerful vehicles of spiritual awakening in existence. They challenge you on every level, demand that you grow and become all that you’re destined to be – all in a loving and nurturing space.
Unlike traditional marriages that are committed to material safety and comfort, the spiritual partnership goes one step further and makes a commitment to mutual spiritual growth. Within spiritual partnerships, the focus is not just on us, our needs, our desires, and our petty grievances – instead, the focus gradually becomes local, national, and global.
Prematurely labeling your relationship as a ‘twin flame’ or ‘soul mate’ partnership can create unnecessary stress. “Why?” you may wonder. The answer is that when we label love too early, we create the unnecessary pressure of having to live up to these beliefs and expectations.
When we feel incomplete, lonely and disconnected from ourselves, the ideal of true love becomes a beacon of hope promising to save us. Soon we start sincerely believing that our beloved will “complete us,” and thus make our lives meaningful again. Unfortunately, such a myth is destructive to our mental, emotional, and psychological well-being in the long term.
No matter what level of mental and emotional maturity both partners are at, a twin flame relationship is based on mutual respect, compassion, and the desire to grow. Any form of intentionally inflicted physical, emotional, psychological, or spiritual abuse should be seen as a BIG red flag – and I would advise running for the hills as soon as possible.
The sole purpose of twin flame relationships is to help us spiritually mature and become the best versions of ourselves possible. Perhaps the most powerful aspect of these connections is their ability to expose the dark, disowned, fractured parts of ourselves that we’ve hidden away (known as the ‘shadow self’) relentlessly.