I had to get in touch with the source, I had to go back into my abandonment issues with my mother, I had to go into issues with my father I hadn't even looked at before.
I couldn't have come up with a better metaphor for my life and my internal conflict. It amazes me how quickly we can manifest our fears; not only had I created my 'I'm never satisfied, I'll drive her away' nightmare.
I am attracting a new audience now, one that is more open and more spiritually inclined.
When we were first offered a book deal prior to Avon's, they were trying to get us to change it from the first-person story into a how-to book, and they were offering us some decent money. My agent told me; 'you should really consider this'.
Women are just beginning to see that; there's something about being a woman that's innately different from being a man. I love what I'm seeing take place and I know Julia has so much to offer.
My rite of passage into my brave new world, life on the road.
We busted a lot of family secrets with this. But to make a long story short, my parents relationship was built heavily on security issues for my Mom, and when my Dad couldn't provide security, the relationship unraveled.
The corporate woman has been defined as the 'liberated woman' and I see that as the exact opposite. I think she now is more enslaved, maybe even more than the housewife was; because she's so out of her power, and imitating male power is not female power.
I am learning to forgive my inner geek, and even value him as a free man.
I've worked so hard to eliminate the inner geek from my life. I suddenly realize I have no patience for those people who still have their geeks showing. Now I see why being 'normal' has been so important to me.
There is trust in there being a Spirit who loves me and wants me to have love in my life. I trust in this higher power, it is what keeps me moving forward no matter what happens.
My trust in a higher power that wants me to survive and have love in my life, is what keeps me moving forward.
My quest these days is to find my long lost inner child, but I'm afraid if I do, I'll end up with food in my hair and way too in love with the cats.
I couldn't be in a relationship and behave like somebody else or pretend I felt something I didn't feel. And that includes saying things I thought might jeopardize the relationship.
Whatever I have not yet learned to tolerate in myself inevitably will appear in my children. In this way, they, like Julia, guide me to a new level of self-awareness and everyone benefits.
Real freedom is creative, proactive, and will take me into new territories. I am not free if my freedom is predicated on reacting to my past.
Courage is always rewarded.
Running away will never make you free.
I know that Julia has been given to me for my spiritual growth, and this moment is perfect for us both. I know that I love her, and I know she's my soul mate.
