I got real important relationships in my life that are very empowering relationships.
I want to tell my jokes. I want to have time with my children. I want to entertain people. And at one point, I'll walk away from show business. But I don't want to walk away empty-handed.
I think extreme sports are really good for relieving stress.
Stand-up is the kind of gig that'll show you where you're at.
There's a lot of people who don't want anything from me but to laugh and have a good time. You see them at the show and they like - they dress up to come see your show and stuff. And they pack these auditoriums and it's a lot of fun, man. It's like, this is how I started, and it's still fun for me.
I get a little heated when I talk about the past. But I wanted to be clear - I'm not mad at anybody - not anymore.
Most of the people around me have a vested interest in how much money I make. You know, so a celebrity could find themselves in a position where people could have meetings about their life without them involved. And when I say 'their life' I mean not their professional life either. They could talk about their personal life.
My wife asked me once if I weren't a comedian what I would do. I couldn't answer the question. I never imagined doing anything else.
My father told me 'Name your price in the beginning. If it ever gets more expensive than the price you name, get out of there.'
You can become famous but you can't become unfamous. You can become infamous but not unfamous.
You can't get unfamous. You can get infamous but you can't get unfamous.
You can't get un-famous. You can get infamous, but you can't get un-famous.
The way the people around you position themselves around you to get in your pockets and in your mind is infuriating to me.
I just always loved stand-up. It's like magic. You say something, and a whole room full of people laughs together. Say something else, they laugh again. The fact that people come to see that and participate in that... I don't know, it's just like magic.
If I put forth a legitimate effort, then I feel like, if that doesn't work out, that's all I can do.
America, I appreciate you liking me.
My generation is under-entertained.
Because I was surrounded by so much negativity at some point that it took me going back and doing stand-up to realize, you know, people really like me.
I've done 10 or 11 pilots for network television, which is ridiculous.
I love Ohio.
