Just because a guy is a Christian doesn't automatically mean he is a good fit for me (or that I am a good fit for him). Good marriages are built on more than two nice Christians getting married. Since the purpose of marriage is to glorify God and serve Him well together, I realized that I need to marry a guy with whom I could serve the Lord effectively.
Before you enter into a romantic relationship with any guy, I highly encourage you to ask yourself these three questions too. Is this guy a genuine Christian? Are we both mature enough to enter into a serious relationship? Could I see myself potentially marrying him?
Just because we loved each other and wanted to get married didn't automatically mean we should.
If your dating relationship is sustained by sin, what will sustain your marriage?
If a guy pressures you to compromise sexually, he is not showing you Christlike, agape love. He's not encouraging you toward purity and holiness. He's not striving to honor God in that area of the relationship. He's focusing on his wants and is sadly using you to satisfy them. He's being selfish and putting his desires above all else.
Contrary to Hollywood's shallow messages about true love, marriage isn't so much about fireworks and perfect matches as it is about lasting, sacrificial commitment. It's about selflessly agreeing to love another human being until you die. It's about choosing to join lives as a team to serve and glorify God together.
In our modern day and age, words like faithfulness, lifelong commitment, and covenant are not very popular. Instead, we prefer words such as soul mate, true love, and happiness. But the truth is, these feelings-based words do not produce the type of enduring marriages that we long for.
If a man truly understands the gospel, and truly understands what Christ did for him, he will be passionate about Christ. If he's not passionate about his relationship with God, you need to know why. Why isn't he passionate about the Savior who gave up His life for him?
Choosing a husband will be one of the biggest decisions you will ever make. This will be the man you will spend the rest of your life with. You will fall asleep next to him at night. Wake up next to him in the morning. Spend holidays together. Raise children together. Be grandparents together. Create your best memories together. Share your hardest moments together.
Whether you are single or married, one of the most effective ways to influence godly leadership in men is through words of encouragement.
Where is this guy going in life? Does he have a kingdom mindset? Do we share similar passions for life? Could I support his vision as his wife and teammate? Would we make a better team together than apart?
I quickly learned that it takes a lot more than good looks and passion to maintain long-term love.
