Sex ought to be a wholly satisfying link between two affectionate people from which they emerge unanxious, rewarded, and ready for more.
Sex is the most important sort of adult play. If you can't relax here you never will
There are only two guidelines in good sex, don't do anything you don't really enjoy and find out what are your partner needs and don't balk them if you can help it.
We may eventually come to realize that chastity is no more a virtue than malnutrition.