Quotes Tagged "the-happynesswala"

The untrained human mind is like an untrained dog. It is constantly pulling at the leash. It will run amok. And the dog's master is only reacting; they are never in control. Similarly, when your mind is untrained, you are never in control. The untrained mind will constantly pull you in a zillion directions. It will mix up unrelated issues/contexts/situations and paint horrible worst-case scenarios that are yet to/may never happen. Thoughts of worthlessness, what-if, anger, grief, guilt, cluelessness, fear, stress, anxiety...all of these are a function of the untrained mind. Your untrained mind is the only villain in your Life – not people, not events, not destiny, not fate...the truth is the mind cannot thrive in the now, it becomes powerless; so, it runs back into the dead past or races forward into the unborn future. Which is why you must use your Life experiences, such as the one you are going through right now, and train your mind to be in the present, in the moment. In the now, you are in control. When you are in control, you simply are. You are happy!

We are all a product of our experiences, of what happens to us, of what we go through. We make choices, we stumble, we fall, we endure pain, we go through intense strife, suffering and yet, eventually, we do awaken to what we believe is a greater understanding of Life. Each of us is a miracle in that sense – it is indeed a miracle that we have survived what we have been through! Clearly, I wouldn't be able to do what I am doing, or even say this with so much conviction, without going through what I have gone through. This is so true for you too. Isn't it a miracle that Life curates such unique experiences to help us be who we are, to do what we do, so people may learn and benefit from each of us, one way or the other?

Every experience that you go through is part of the process of the unfolding of your myth. If you sit back and reflect on your own 2019, on how Life dealt with you this year, you will see how every upheaval, every scar in your Life, is precious in its own way. You will realize how you have emerged stronger and wiser from each experience you have been through. You will be amazed at how you have learnt to cope, how you have moved on this year too, just as you have done, all your Life. This is why it is pointless to label a year as good or bad (or ugly). A set of events simply happened to you this past year. And another set will happen in the year coming up. So, instead of over-analyzing and labeling the year gone by, embrace what is, and train your mind to be non-worrying, non-frustrated and non-suffering. This holds the key to your Happiness.

A year can really, truly, be filled with Happiness! No matter what you are faced with, if you don’t complicate your Life with human ideas – if you don’t bring up your expectations, if you don’t analyze what you want and what you deserve and instead humbly accept what you are given – you will be happy!

Everything that's happening to you, to me, to us, is part of an inscrutable Master Plan. And that grand design is not flawed! Everything is the way it should be and is going exactly per that Plan! And today is always better than yesterday. At least your ability to deal with what you are faced with has improved with one more day's effort of dealing with it.

If you must really change yourself, if you must really transform personally, you must feel that urge from within you. Any attempt at “merely wanting to change”, will be yet another resolution that will soon be broken and discarded, forgotten. And for the need to change to arise from within you, please spend quality time looking at the futility of clinging on to all those factors, those excuses you give yourself, that hold you back from changing. Once you understand the futility of clinging on to your self-limiting beliefs, you will change – your current realities and your Life – in ways in which you can’t even fathom just now!

The truth is that this Life is a miracle, every moment you are alive is a miracle…the sunrise, the sunset, the dew drop, the moon, the stars, the birds chirping…every thing, and everyone, around you is a miracle. But you miss these everyday miracles because you are steeped in grief, in pining for what is over, what is dead and isn’t there or you are gripped by anxiety and fear, worrying about the unborn future, about what is still to arrive. You are so consumed by imagining that your Life is one endless saga of problems that you don’t see the magic and beauty of your Life, of your miracles. In fact, this human form you have is a miracle; despite your frailties, your circumstances and your vulnerabilities, “you are the miracle you seek”!

To be sure, there is no method, no single way, to anchor in Faith and employ Patience. Letting go, trusting the process of Life and living with Faith and Patience, is the way. Living through our crippling bankruptcy for over 12 years now, Vaani and I have realized that Faith does not always solve our problems immediately. But having Faith in the process of Life – that what goes around, comes around; that what goes up will come down some day, only to go back up another day – certainly helps us to cope with our problems better. Keeping the Faith also teaches us Patience. Unless you embrace these twin philosophies, and live practising them together, you will not see the miracles in your everyday Life.

You have to believe in what you do surely. And you must not compromise on how you express yourself through what you are doing, what you are sharing. Most definitely, you must not compromise for any gain, material gain particularly! This is the key to Happiness.

Undoubtedly, you will be subject to the pulls and pressures of everyday living. You will feel angry, left out, let down, jealous, disturbed, fearful and insecure. Events, people, things – any of these can trigger off these debilitating emotions. Don’t resist any of these feelings. Hold them up. And examine them closely. What do they make you feel? Don’t they make you intensely unhappy? If they do, let them go. Anything, or anyone, that makes you unhappy does not have a place in your Life. Know that you have a choice to walk away from them or throw them out. Exercise that choice. This is personal leadership. This is why happiness is an intensely personal choice.

What must come to you, for you, always finds its way to you...

When someone lets you down or chooses to disagree with you, your anger, your grief, arises from their behavior. Or so you believe. But if you observe your thoughts closely, you will find that it is your mind that rushes off immediately to demand: “How dare they treat me like this?” So, essentially, it is your expectation of that person, that they must behave in certain way that is causing you agony. Just drop that expectation. And you will not have any suffering on account of anyone or their actions anymore. Herein lies the secret to remaining unmoved, detached and dispassionate about what others are saying or doing to you. This is the way you protect your inner peace and happiness.

You are unlikely to find the perfect Life that you want. Even so, you can live fully with what you have, with what you have been given. And you do that by looking Life squarely in the eye, by facing it and by accepting what is, by learning to be happy despite the circumstances.

Sometimes the best way to deal with a broken family is to leave its members to be at peace within their own broken worlds. When each one is at peace with who they are, with the problems they are dealing with and are not sure of the way forward, then letting things be, just be, is a sane option. At least each one is individually at peace. And that’s no small miracle! People being born into a family does not necessarily ensure that they stay together. It takes trust and transparency to build and nurture families. When these values cease to exist, merely coming together under a roof is a lie. It achieves no purpose!

If it is meant for you, it will come to you. It will find you and reach you. So, don’t despair when, despite your best intention and effort, something does not happen the way you envisioned it and planned it. Take it easy. Of course, you have every right to have an intention, put forth a plan and execute it, but you have no right to insist that just because you did all that you must get what you want. The outcomes are never in your hand. The idea that you deserve something is what you have grown within you. So, drop that idea. Just do your bit, and do it well, in any situation. And leave the results, the outcomes, to Life. If you must get it, you will. When you do, be grateful for Life’s compassion. When you don’t, be accepting of Life’s verdict.

The ability to “take Life as it comes” is a blessing. This wisdom can only come from having experienced pain and from understanding the power of acceptance.

Pain is not a monster that is out to annihilate you as is popularly believed. Pain is a great teacher. While you can’t avoid pain, it teaches you, through your acceptance of any Life situation, that suffering is optional; that there is a lot of Life during and after a crisis. Truly, acceptance of a painful situation is the only way to deal with it.

Over time I have realized that having an honest conversation over a complex issue with someone is never difficult provided you are given an equal opportunity to present your views. Which is, as long as there is dignity and decorum between the parties concerned, the conversation is relevant and possible. You state what you have to. They state what they have to. You may both agree or disagree but both parties respect each other’s points of view and stay focused on resolving the issue on hand. But the moment someone tries to demonstrate power or is being deceitful, the conversation has lost its purpose. Then you must simply leave the conversation. There is no point in trying to counter the other party’s machinations while ruining your inner peace. Sometimes, the best way to make an important point is not to say anything at all.

Intelligent living simply means recognizing the perishable nature of Life and choosing not to postpone Happiness. It means focusing only on what matters most to you, on what you love doing. A simple beginning can be made by investing in your “Me Time”, in one hour on yourself daily – start with your health and with what you are deeply passionate about, what makes you come alive! When you do create that one hour for yourself, you will, magically, see how you gain control of the remaining 23 hours of the day!

Not reacting with anger, but responding with compassion and equanimity, is a personal choice. Particularly so, in an explosive situation, when someone is provoking you, by trampling all over your self-esteem. How can you employ compassion when someone is spewing venom? Well, if you observe their behavior closely, someone causing you pain and anguish is actually suffering a lot within themselves. Their thoughts and actions are only reflecting their distressed state of mind. They surely know not what they are doing. So, respond – don’t react – with compassion. Ahimsa is not just non-violent action. It includes non-violent thought as well. Respond with ahimsa – that’s the best way to disarm your ‘opponent’! When you leave the other party guessing, as to why you are not striking back, you have won the battle without even fighting it. Isn’t that a great way to be protect your inner peace and profit from it?