Your mind cannot possibly understand God. Your heart already knows. Minds were designed for carrying out the orders of the heart.
The soul will take that love and put it where it can best be used.
As your faith is strengthened, you will find that there is no longer the need to have a sense of control, that things will flow as they will, and that you will flow with them, to your great delight and benefit.
One does not have to stand again the gale. One yields and becomes part of the wind.
