Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.
I obviously have a knack for getting on paper what a lot of people have thought and didn't realize they thought. And they say, 'Hey, yeah!' And they like that.
Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.
I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran.
If dogs could talk it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.
Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?
The only people who say worse things about politicians that reporters do are other politicians.
Writers don't retire. I will always be a writer.
Death is a distant rumor to the young.
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.
Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.
